Start with what you DON’T want

January. A time when many people set goals for what they want to achieve in the year ahead.
Exciting for some. Totally overwhelming for others.
What do you want to achieve in 2020? What’s your goal? Where do you see yourself in 12 months’ time? What does success mean for you? What’s your dream job?
All great questions but they’re big and can be scary as hell.
‘I’ve got no bloody idea!’ you may silently scream, throwing your hands in the air as self-doubt and panic seep in.
If that’s you, I want you to stop.
Put your hands down.
Dial the pressure back.
It’s all ok.
One of the best ways to get yourself closer to the answers without the overwhelm is to reverse engineer it.
Rather than focussing on what you DO want this year, start with what you DON’T want.
Ask yourself questions like:

  • What don’t I want to do in 2020?
  • What am I doing now that I want to stop?
  • What do I not want in a job or career?
  • What sort of work doesn’t interest me?
  • What sort of people do I not want to surround myself with?
  • Where don’t I want to be in 12 months’ time?

Write your answers down (you’ll find they come much easier than before). Make a list or draw a mind map – whatever works for you but get it out of your head.
Then look at it. What you’ve done is narrow down your pool of options. 
By focussing on what you don’t want, you’re now closer to working out what you do.


Leah Mether helps people get out of their own way with the development of soft skills (which are really hard). She is a speaker, trainer, facilitator and mentor.

Tickets are now on sale for Leah’s workshop ‘Remove the Roadblocks’ in Traralgon on 25 February 2020. Find out more at

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