Culture is a verb

Last week, I said something to a group of leaders I was training that I’ve been saying for years: Culture is a verb.

It’s not something you have. It’s something you do.

Given what’s playing out publicly in the AFL at the moment, that message feels particularly timely.

The definition of culture I use in my work is: “Culture is the behaviours that are supported, rewarded, tolerated and make people feel included.”

And for me, the most important word in that definition is “tolerated”.

The worst behaviour you tolerate becomes your culture. It tells people, “That’s what we do here.”

It’s easy for organisations to say they value respect, integrity and teamwork. Most genuinely do. But saying those things matter and living them every day are two different things, particularly when upholding the standard requires courage.

The real test of culture is often what happens in the small moments when you could get away with doing nothing.

It’s not only about being respectful to women when women are in the room. It’s what you say when they’re not.

It’s whether you let someone bitch about a colleague to the rest of the team or decide not to participate in the pile-on.

It’s whether an offensive remark about someone because of their gender, sexuality, race or background gets challenged when that person isn’t there to hear it.

It’s whether you agree with someone to their face and then undermine them behind their back.

And it’s whether you excuse poor behaviour because someone is good at their job, powerful, well-liked, or your mate.

Because if the standard only applies to some people, some of the time, it’s not really the standard.

None of us will get this right all the time. We’re human. Sometimes we laugh awkwardly because we don’t know what to say. Sometimes we stay quiet because we’re caught off guard. Sometimes we realise afterwards that we should have handled something differently.

The challenge is what we choose to do next time.

That’s where courage comes in.

Sometimes courage is calling out the behaviour when everyone else is laughing. Sometimes it’s refusing to join the gossip or pile-on. Sometimes it’s saying, “Hang on, that’s not okay,” when it would be much easier to keep your mouth shut and move on.

And no, this doesn’t mean your workplace has to become humourless or overly serious. Of course people can have fun. Of course there can be banter, jokes and personality. I’d hate to work somewhere there wasn’t.

But there’s a difference between a workplace where people feel free to have a laugh and one where poor behaviour gets dressed up as “banter” and everyone is expected to put up with it.

And don’t think that saying you have a good culture makes it so.

Culture isn’t what you say about your workplace. It’s what people experience in it.

That’s why you can never rest on your laurels and say, “We have a good culture.”

Culture isn’t fixed. One person can undermine it through their behaviour, but one person can also positively shift it by having the courage to behave differently and show others that different is possible.

That person doesn’t have to be the most senior person in the room either.

It can be you.

Culture is built by choice or chance, design or default. Either way, it’s being shaped every day.

It’s built in what you encourage, what you reward, what you challenge, what you walk past and, importantly, what you role model.

Culture is not something you have.

It’s something you do.