Today is R U OK? Day, a reminder to check in with those around us. But what happens when you ask the question and the answer is “No”? Sometimes, asking reveals struggles you weren’t aware of. You might discover someone on your team isn’t coping at all. Knowing how to respond in that moment could be a game changer—or even a lifesaver.

I’ve heard it before: “But Leah, this is why I avoid asking. I’m out of my depth if they say they’re struggling. I’d rather stick to work conversations and leave the personal stuff to the professionals.”

I get it. But as a leader, you have a responsibility to care for your people—especially when they’re facing tough times. You don’t need to be a psychologist or counsellor, and you’re not expected to solve their problems. But you do need to care. With a few simple strategies, you can help someone who’s not OK get the support they need.

Still not sure? Think of it this way: If someone had a heart attack at work, would you walk away because you’re not a doctor? Of course not! The same goes if someone’s struggling mentally or emotionally. You don’t walk away. You provide first aid. And that’s what this is—mental health first aid. Not all the aid, just the initial response.

This is where the Mental Health First Aid (MHFA) Action Plan comes in. Known as ALGEE, it’s five simple steps that any leader can take:

1. Approach the person, assess, and assist with any crisis.
2. Listen and communicate non-judgmentally.
3. Give support and provide information.
4. Encourage the person to seek professional help.
5. Encourage other supports.

For practical tips on each step, visit: MHFA Action Plan.

The key is to be there and listen. You don’t need to “fix” them or solve the problem. As Adam Grant says, “In hard times, people don’t want to be told to look on the bright side. They want to know you’re on their side.” It’s not about cheering people up—it’s about showing up.

Some further tips:

• Open conversations gently using “I” statements: “I’ve noticed,” “I’ve observed,” or “I’m worried.” For example: “I’ve noticed you’ve been withdrawn the past few weeks—are you OK?”
• Empathise and acknowledge their feelings: “That sounds really hard” or “It sounds like you’re feeling disillusioned—have I got that right?”
• Know what resources are available, like your Employee Assistance Program (EAP), Beyond Blue, or Lifeline, and have those details ready before the conversation.
• If you’re ever concerned someone might harm themselves, don’t leave them alone. Call Lifeline on 13 11 14 or the Suicide Call Back Service on 1300 659 467.
• Follow up with the person and check in to see how they are travelling.

Remember, you don’t need all the answers. Just showing up for your people, asking the question and listening, really listening can save a life.