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Put a pause between your reaction and your response

|||  —  21/06/16

It’s easy to get overwhelmed when dealing with conflict, or to become emotional when having difficult conversations; but while this is perfectly normal, it can impact your ability to effectively communicate your point of view.

Often we get caught up and feel the need to respond immediately in our upset or agitated state, but it’s ok and in fact sometimes much better, to put a pause between our reaction and response.

If you find yourself getting angry or emotional, try asking for a break or more time. Say something like: “You’ve actually caught me a bit off guard. Let me have a think about it and I’ll get back to you in half an hour.”

Use this time to think about exactly what you want to articulate and gather yourself before going back to the conversation in a calm, direct and more assertive manner. That way, you’re more likely to communicate what you really want to say, not what your emotions overwhelm you with.

If you’d like to learn more about how to have difficult conversations, come along to my public workshop Effective Communications: Developing Assertiveness for Personal and Career Success in Trafalgar on Monday 18 July from 7-9pm. Limited tickets remain at www.improvecomms.eventbrite.com.au.

Leah Mether is a communication and soft skills trainer obsessed with making the people part of leadership and work life easier.

With more than 15 years’ experience working with thousands of clients, and an acclaimed book to her name, Leah knows what it takes to communicate under pressure. Like you, she knows the challenge of conflict, personality clashes, and difficult conversations.

Leah is renowned for her practical, engaging, straight-shooting style. Utilising her Five Cs® model of communication, she helps leaders and teams shift from knowing to doing, and radically improve their effectiveness.

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