How do I make someone talk about an issue when they don’t want to? That’s the question Lisa* asked me after attending my Don’t Shoot the Messenger workshop. Lisa was married with four kids and her relationship with her husband was in trouble. She’d tried to speak with him about their challenges many times, but […]

This year marks 12 years since I worked as a newspaper journalist for the Latrobe Valley Express in Gippsland, Victoria. I loved being part of the newsroom: the pace, the energy, the banter, the inside scoop on what was going on. But it was more than that. My time as a journo taught me skills […]

Once you’ve had a difficult conversation, it’s tempting to think your job is done, but the best communicators know the high-pressure conversation is not the end of the story. If you want to maintain your relationship with a person, it’s important you continue to communicate with them regularly and follow up after a difficult conversation […]

When losing control is your normal, your communication also loses its effectiveness. People ignore what you say because your behaviour distracts and detracts from your message. When you lose your cool – regardless of how legitimate your message is – the focus shifts to your behaviour instead.

Actions speak louder than words. It’s a cliché because it’s true. What you DO communicates far more powerfully than what you SAY and if your words and actions are out of alignment, it’s your actions people will believe. Simon was an old-school ‘command and control’ leader who often told his staff that respect was one […]

An intense fear of failure stifles many people’s #communication. Our fear of saying the wrong thing and offending someone keeps us silent, or our concern about embarrassing ourselves in front of the boss means we don’t put forward a suggestion about a new initiative. So many of us see failure as a bad thing, something […]